Another Year Older...

Welp... the day has come and gone and I am now officially another year older.  Doesn't really feel any different and I spent most of last year not really knowing if I was 37 or 38 so it wasn't a huge shock to the system turning the big 3-8.

It was the Victoria Day long weekend here in Canada so I was able to chill out and relax for an extra day... and that is exactly what I did.  I finished my book, I had been reading the infamous "The Girl on the Train" by Paula Hawkins and... nope... wasn't what I was hoping!  Not really that gripping, edge of your seat thriller that I was anticipating but isn't that always the way?  You read and hear the hype of a book/movie for so long that by the time you get to actually reading it, it doesn't quite measure up?  Other than that, we had a family dinner for my birthday... mmmmm, steak,  spent hours on the ball field and, yes, I even painted my nails... many MANY times.

Let's talk nails for a second... you will recall from my last post (and only post) that I am falling off the YouTube bandwagon.  I actually started spreading the word to some of my YouTube friends, those that I have made connections with outside of the comments section and those that are now legitimate friends and while most think I should just take a break for the summer and then come back strong, they all understand the need to back away.  YouTube can be a hard place and having that in common, we can all see the struggle of constantly staying on top of the trends and the need to be current.  I still haven't uploaded a video but do have one that needs to be filmed to fulfill a commitment made prior to my decision to leave... hence the swatching this weekend... ugh!  If anything, sitting at my kitchen table in 20 degree gorgeous weather just solidified my desire to NOT do that anymore!!

I actually feel so much more free just admitting that... knowing that the decision I have made is the right one for me.

Now, what's coming next... we shall be talking about my journey towards a cruelty free nail polish collection... YIKES!

A Year of Changes

As I sit here, looking at the last few days of before my 38th birthday, I find myself looking at my life and seeing many changes that need to happen to make me a happier person.  Negative start, right?  Well, it's not nearly as negative as it sounds.

For starters, I am a happy person.  I have a wonderful, loving husband; a beautiful, smart and amazing son; a family who loves me unconditionally; and a brood of animals that never fail to bring a smile to my face.  Not to mention a full-time job that I enjoy getting up for everyday; a group of friends that enjoy my company as much as I enjoy theirs; and all the major necessities of life... car, home, food, clothes... blah, blah, blah.

However, I can look back over the past few years and see that something went awry when it comes to taking care of my own personal happiness.  When my uncle passed away 4 summers ago, I was an avid reader and book-blogger and in dealing with grief, I found I couldn't concentrate on reading so I moved to watching YouTube videos... which led to filming videos and collecting all of the things (nail polish, makeup, candles, bath crap... you name it, I want and need it).

As I said, looking my 38th birthday in the face, I realize that I am ready to make some changes.  Not only do I want to fix my diet (or at least start a diet) which we will get into later, but I would like to re-evaluate my 'hobby'.

Nail polish has been a huge part of my life for the last 4 years and while I absolutely love painting my nails, I am tried of the constant need to have the most current collections and the time needed to swatch each collection and take pictures, film the review, edit and upload... it's about taking back my life.  Enjoying the polish and not feeling like my hobby is my job.  It's so amazing being able to get new polish collections for free but I am beginning to realize that the downfalls of spending all my time online isn't necessarily worth the benefits of a house full of nail polish.

Saying all that, can I actually sit here and say that I am 100% ready to throw in the towel?  No, not 100% but I am right there... looking the end of YouTube in the face and not feeling overly bad/sad about it.  So what's next?  How exactly do you end a 4-year hobby and something that has ultimately changed your life?  Is it something you do cold turkey or do you slowly make the transition?  I am usually more of an instant gratification gal... rip off the bandaid, right?

Well, let's see how it goes... start small and work our way to the feeling of personal happiness.  Making myself smile when I think of JUST ME is so important and I am ready to make the changes necessary to make it happen!

Here we go...